How do you define success? Has your definition changed since you first considered what you wanted to be successful in?
As the founder of Third Ear Conflict Resolution (CR), I’ve navigated the ever-changing landscape of workplace dispute resolution for more than two decades. Each June, I reflect on our journey since launching the firm on June 23, 2003. The changes have been profound, not only in technology but also in how we perceive success as a group of individuals. I share the below insights to help you make sure you’re on the path you still want to be.
If your primary goal in life is to survive, you’re already setting yourself up for failure. None of us is getting out alive.
A Personal Blueprint
Like most people, I had no real understanding of success when I began my professional career. I followed several other people’s blueprints for success. First, it was promotion to Operations Supervisor. Then, it was a move to Human Resources Supervisor, hoping that would launch me to the next promotion. It didn’t, and I ended up in a job I hated. Fortunately, I had almost attained my bachelor’s degree in Education (Sport Administration), so I had a few offers to work in the industry. I achieved some success there, until I filed a lawsuit against a former employer.
Administrative assistant, retail associate, waiter, babysitter, law clerk, and minor league hockey agent all became pieces of my career puzzle. Although I benefited from each of them, I did not feel successful during those years. Yet each got me one step closer to where I am today.
It would be difficult to map my process and promise any certain outcome, which is how I discovered no one could guide me very far, either. We all need to learn how to chart our courses with our unique experiences and the tools we have available in any given moment.
Shifting Definitions Over Time
Our definitions of success aren’t static; they morph with life stages. In 2003, I was a younger entrepreneur—energetic, ambitious, and perhaps a touch naive. That served me well through the start-up phase of this firm, when a little ignorance is bliss.
Today, my priorities have shifted. My business goals align with my personal values, and my definition of success reflects this evolution. That is why I chose to stop taking new litigation matters after December 31, 2023, and Third Ear CR is now focusing fully on informal resolution of workplace disputes.
Keeping you out of court has always been our goal, and I see now why continuing to offer litigation services is inconsistent with that commitment.
Feeling Successful vs. Being Successful
Don’t rely solely on how you feel when defining what your experience of success should include. Sometimes, we achieve great things but fail to feel successful. At other times, we might feel successful even when external validation is lacking. It’s essential to recognize both aspects and find harmony between them.
The Zone of Competence
Success can lead us down unexpected paths, especially when we are not clearly defining it for ourselves. We become proficient in certain areas—our Zones of Competence—but that doesn’t guarantee fulfillment. Most of us have many tasks we are good enough at and should probably leave to the experts. This frees us up to work in our Zones of Genius, or at least our Zones of Excellence.
The Power of Collaboration
The self-made business owner is a mythical creature. To thrive, Third Ear CR has relied on clients, coaches, consultants, employees, mentors, and vendors. We know that collaboration fuels growth, and we are proud to have a big network of Go-Givers we can entrust our clients to.
Success lies not only in our achievements, but also in our ability to empower others to achieve more than they think is possible.
Need to clear some legal clutter to advance your success?
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