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Thrive in Your Job: A Guide to Excelling from Application to Advancement

Nance Schick · Jan 2, 2024 ·

Most people are excited when starting a new job. Despite the challenges and learning curves, they expect to thrive in their new roles. Their employers also expect them to, even when they don’t set them up for success.

In my experience as an employment lawyer, mediator, and human resources supervisor, both employers and employees let their optimism fizzle quickly. Below are some tips to help you:

  • Keep your positive attitude
  • Thrive in your current or next role
  • Create employment as an effective partnership that benefits everyone involved


Seek Compatible Work

One of the most important steps in finding work you can thrive in is an ongoing process of understanding:

  1. Why you’re looking for a job. If your only answer is that you need money or certain benefits an employer can provide, you’re likely starting with resentment that will make you unattractive to many employers. To shift your mindset quickly, make a list of 10 benefits to having a job. Review it whenever you get discouraged or resentful.
  2. What you are great at. Consider activities you enjoy so much that you can do them for hours without realizing how much time has passed. There’s no guarantee you can make a living from these activities, but they might require skills that you can transfer to a job that pays.
  3. How much money you need to have the lifestyle you want. This is an intricate formula that will change as you change. Most of us start by only covering basic needs like rent, food, and transportation, which leaves us living paycheck to paycheck. A better formula might double that amount to allow for retirement savings, emergency savings, giving, fun, and personal or professional development.
  4. What fits into your life. Or what you are willing to do to make it fit. Driving 90 minutes each way can be tiring for a lot of people, but you might enjoy this time if it gives you a benefit you don’t currently have. You might also be willing to move. However, too much disruption might not make even the most prestigious title or highest salary worth the tradeoff. Don’t assume that what works for others will work for you.
  5. What individual employers want and need. Yes, employers need employees to do work so they can generate revenue. Go deeper. What specifically do they need to sustain the business? How can you contribute to this?


Craft Your Application

Notice the use of the word “craft” here. Applying for a job is an art form. If you want to thrive in a role, your application is not just about showcasing your skills and experience. You need to:

  • Understand the employer’s vision and values
  • Attempt to align your vision and values with the employer’s
  • Help the employer envision you working there (and doing a great job)
  • Avoid employers that pay well but don’t align

Use Cover Letters Effectively

Don’t underestimate the power of cover letters. They aren’t just used for formality or to make your life miserable. They give you a chance to help the potential employer connect the dots between your application and the business’ needs. Demonstrate your passion for the role by sharing what you hope to achieve if hired. This not only sets you apart but also invites a mutual commitment between you and your potential employer for everyone to thrive.


See Yourself in the Role

Once you’ve convinced the employer that you are a top candidate for the role, you need to prepare for the interview. Don’t expect to reiterate what was in your cover letter and resume. This is an opportunity to tell the interviewers something else that makes you a great fit. Envision your impact on the employer’s goals and the positive changes you want to bring. Be confident, yet careful not to insult how things are currently being done.

Remember, you are interviewing them, too. If you’re having difficulty imagining yourself in the role, ask what a typical day would look like if you were already part of the team.


Meet Performance Expectations

Securing the job only begins your success journey. Now, you have to do what you promised to do in exchange for the pay and benefits the employer promised to provide.

Monthly Key Performance Indicators (KPIs) help the employer gauge your progress and provide you a roadmap for thriving, at least in this role. Consistently meeting these benchmarks is usually the minimum you can do to keep your job. If you want to advance, you will usually need to consistently contribute more to the employer’s goals.



Navigate Challenges Skillfully

Even employees who thrive at work will encounter challenges. Conflict is a natural part of living, and it is a sign that you are growing into the next stage of your life. You will rarely do something perfectly the first time. Mastery takes practice, which includes a lot of trial and error. Expect it, and stay focused on finding solutions.

Also, expect occasional disputes over the way things should be done, how actions and comments are perceived, and more. The diversity of workplaces almost guarantees these will occur. Again, they are a sign of growth.

Fortunately, most conflicts can be resolved before they escalate and end up in legal action that gets everyone off course. When issues arise and tempers flare, step back and make the Seven Choices discussed in my book, DIY Conflict Resolution:

  1. Forgive yourself for having conflicts
  2. Acknowledge yourself for taking action to resolve them (including by stepping back first)
  3. Forgive the world, your co-workers, your boss, etc. for having and creating conflicts
  4. Free the emotions privately and in a manner that causes no harm
  5. Clear your mind, or at least make sure it’s not racing
  6. Assume you know nothing about the situation and look at it anew
  7. Listen with your third ear for the hurts you can heal or the fears you can calm

Once you are calm and focused on finding solutions to the challenges, you can discuss the situation with your employer. Open a conversation and ask for input. Don’t demand a specific resolution. You can offer your ideas, but remember to function as a partner in the pursuit of mutually beneficial goals. Be a team player and focus more on the employer’s success than yourself. When you are on a winning team, you will win, too.


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What Can You Do When You Hate Your Job?

DIY Conflict Resolution for Professionals, Workplace Dispute Resolution conflict coaching, employment contracts, employment partnership, interns, thriving at work

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The Seven Choices

Forgive Yourself Acknowledge Yourself Forgive the World Free the Emotions Clear Your Mind Assume Nothing Listen with Your Heart

The Five Actions

Define the Conflict Identify the Interests Play with the Possibilities Create the Future Stay on PARR

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