If you emailed me late last week, you know I was in Sarasota to lead a conflict resolution workshop at the Florida Creativity Conference (FLCC). I highly recommend you consider attending it next year or the Creative Problem Solving Institute (CPSI) in Buffalo this June. These events provide additional opportunities to develop skills to resolve conflicts in all areas of your life. I have come home with more tools and language to help you HAQ workplace disputes.
I’ve long known that sustainably resolving disputes Humanely, Affordably, and Quickly (HAQ) requires more than just a J.D. or law license. It requires a willingness to look outside the legal silo and borrow techniques from other disciplines. The FLCC was a powerful reminder of this. Here are some of the highlights.
Creative Problem Solving (CPS) and the “FEAR” Framework
As a survivor of multiple crimes, I love the concept of post-traumatic growth and reframing experiences like fear. Keynote Speaker Prashant Anilkumar gave me that. Not only did he validate my desire to use analogy in my work, he explained how to overcome fear in Creative Problem Solving (CPS):
- Fracture: Break a process down to its core components. Rather than copying the traditional model for any process, consider each step’s purpose.
- Examine: Look at how other industries handle those specific pieces. For example, how might The Ritz-Carlton Hotel or Patagonia welcome a new client, deliver dispute resolution services, gather feedback, maintain the relationship, address complaints, hire and train employees, etc.?
- Analogize: Find the connection between their solution and your problem.
- Reassemble: Build a new, more resilient process.
If you’ve read my first book, DIY Conflict Resolution, you can probably guess why I like the FEAR (re)framework. It mirrors three of the Five Actions:
- Define the Conflict (Fracture)
- Play with the Possibilities (Analogize)
- Create the Future (Reassemble)
As Anilkumar said, “The more you ‘steal’ [borrow or analogize] the more unique your creation will be.” I’m currently looking for inspiration in unexpected places like a Navy base, a brewery, or an antique shop to see how they manage things like legacy and diversity of people, duties, and needs.
Divergent Thinking and FourSight
Over the course of the FLCC, there was much discussion about how innovation thrives on the tension between convergent and divergent thinking. To do this effectively, we have to understand our “cognitive DNA.” There are a number of assessments available to assist us with this, but most participants cited the FourSight assessment, which characterizes people as Clarifiers, Ideators, Developers, or Implementers.
(I am certified to administer and interpret DISC Assessments, which distinguish default behaviors as Dominant, Influencing, Supportive, and Compliant. Whichever you use, remember that it is a tool to open discussions, not box people in.)
Embracing Play and Our “Weird”
We were frequently encouraged to allow ourselves to play to spark divergent thinking. It is no accident that Action Four of the DIY Conflict Resolution is to Play with the Possibilities for resolution. At the conference, I was reminded that the “weirdness” of play is actually a sophisticated tool for unsticking a rigid, transactional dispute and turning it into a resilient partnership.
Of course, it can also be powerful in marketing, as we discussed in a branding session. At Third Ear, our “weirdness” is our superpower. Clients frequently comment that I’m not a typical lawyer, which I take as a compliment. I’m not. A former UPS operations manager and a PHPA agent, I once sued an employer. I won the lawsuit but never collected a dime, losing years of time, money, and energy in the process. My “weird” mix of blue-collar operations, high-level contract negotiations, and the personal scar of litigation is why I am so obsessed with keeping my clients out of court.
Moving Toward the Future
Even as I write this from the airport during yet another delay of more than six hours, I am returning from the FLCC with renewed enthusiasm for the future. Last year, I started writing my second book, Unsustainable: Why Our Workplaces Aren’t Working and What to Do About It with an intent to discover a broad range of possibilities. That has now expanded. The future is bright, as long as we are willing to play, steal from the best, and embrace the “weird” paths that lead us home.
To keep the sense of hope alive, I’m doubling down on three ways to increase mindfulness:
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Put the phone away: Focus is our best defense against the “unsustainable” pace.
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Look into the eyes of companions: True listening starts with human connection.
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Walk slowly: We can’t resolve conflict at a sprint.